‘The Marital Sabbatical’ reemerges

My new call is to bring together two concepts from my lived experience: marital sabbatical and recovery for overgivers.

When my husband and I re-hitched in 2018, I referred to our time of separation as Our Marital Sabbatical on social media. Something interesting happened:

• Months later in a book writing boot camp, my coach encouraged me to develop the topic of how we broke apart to stay together (request #1), but my interest was set elsewhere.

• Four years after the social media posting, a journalist from the largest circulation magazine in Brazil contacted me for an interview on the topic (request #2), just as I rededicated my energies to another project despite its dramas. Again, I was not interested.

• Then, two years later in the same month - and within 24 hours of cutting the cord with that project - a producer from the Tamron Hall Show asked to talk more about the idea of taking a marital sabbatical (request #3).

This time, I am paying attention. Something about ‘marital sabbatical’ consistently captures interest and has value; this has been organically verified many times. So why not give developing the idea a go?

And this time, I see myself more. I acknowledge the persistence of a pattern I thought I had released through my own marital sabbatical: overgiving.

My involvement in the project slowly deteriorated after I suffered the effects of overgiving and pivoted accordingly. As I erected and sustained boundaries around what I would and would not do and how much I would give, my desire to participate in the project decreased. My exit was overdue and, true to form, on terms more generous than called for.

Now, here I am, accepting this new call to bring together two concepts - The Marital Sabbatical and recovery for overgivers. The journey begins.